What A Way For Your Spouse, Mother In Law, And Children To Comply With You!
Can you identify with:
You ask your husband to help with the dishes. He sincerely says, “O.K” and then, at the end of the meal… you can’t find him?
You beg your mother in law not to criticize your cooking and embarrass you at the upcoming family gathering (even though “they’re all family”) and it’s as if you talked to a wall; you hear her saying how it’s too salty, too sweet, or undercooked. (Interesting, not one crumb was left over and your dear mother in law took doubles!)?
Another common scenario. You cancel an appointment to give your child a special treat,; to go to their favorite park. When you get there, though, they make a long face and tell you that they would have preferred to stay at home and watched a video ?
This is so annoying and frustrating!!
Well, I heard a great technique (trick?) on the audio course “Talking To Toddlers” which like most of his ideas are as applicable to your mother in law as to your granddaughter! (I don’t know why he called it “Talking To Toddlers” and not “Persuading People”.)
The way to get people to comply with what you ask them, he contends, is to get them involved in the process of the decision. He calls it “The Rule of Commitment And Consistency”. It means that people tend to act in way that is consistent with what they said or did in the past.
For instance, a company that sold encyclopedias door to door noticed that a lot of people who ordered the encyclopedias would cancel their orders after the salesman left.
To correct this and increase their sales they instructed their salesmen to have the costumer fill out the order form INSTEAD of the salesman. Guess what; the cancelation rate noticeably fell!
The reason for this is “The Rule Of Commitment And Consistency”; when they took an active part in the buying process they were more prone to stick with their decision.
How can you use this in your family?
Instead of just asking your husband to help with the dishes, ask him if he has a good idea how you can finish with the dinner dishes quickly. Keep on talking to him until HE comes up with the idea that HE will lend a helping hand. (It would be better if he would make some gadget for doing the dishes!)
With your mother in law: Ask her for a recipe and have her read it to you. (You don’t really have to follow every thing that she says, she only has to think that it is HER recipe.) If you can work with her in the kitchen (which I understand isn’t always feasible), this is much better. Or even to ask her in what kind of container to serve it will give her the illusion that she helped you make it and will result in not being so critical.
Thirdly, with your children: Have them be a part in the process of choosing the park. When they feel that it is their decision they will enjoy it much more.
I’m telling you, this little audio course is full of great content. (You only need a little creativity to apply it to your situation.)
Don’t be put off by the name. You can use his ideas with all members of your family; your spouse, your in-laws, and your children.
Wether you order it before you reread this article or afterwords, do yourself a favor and make your life easier- click here to order it.
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