Senior and Elderly Care: Understand Where They Are Coming From
Providing senior and elderly care (especially to aging parents) is not always a picnic. The result of aging parents and adult children being together is often times not too positive (putting it mildly). Adult children find it difficult and uncomfortable to get used to aging parents and role reversal, where the adult children have to parent their parents.
There is also another practical problem of taking care of aging parents; it takes lots of time and therefore taking care of elderly parents puts a strain on modern adult children’s (who are also parents to their children) already stressful day. This can cause the adult child to resent and to be irritated by the aging parent and a lot of times the elderly parent senses this. Thus begins friction and tension between them.
However you can’t away from providing senior and elderly care. They need it. Therefore, before you get irritated and frustrated, with your elderly parents or other seniors you are taking care of, take a moment to consider what they are experiencing. Put yourself into their shoes to understand what might be happening in the heads of your aging parents. This is especially important if they were forced into retirement or are impaired in some way.
7 Feelings That Providers of Senior and
Elderly Care Can Expect From The Elderly:
- Low self-esteem. People, including the elderly, feel good about themselves when they produce. Elderly people who have stopped working- in the regular sense of the word- can therefore lose their low self-esteem.
- No self identity. Most people (especially men) in the western world attach their identity to their occupation. For instance, the standard reply to the question, “And what do you do?” is to say, “I’m an accountant, doctor, or factory worker” and not “I’m a husband, an avid golfer, or I watch the news.” When an elderly person retires he loses his self identity.
- A by-product of the 2 points above is that elderly people have little or no self worth. When a person goes work they do something that helps society and their family. When they are too old to work, they feel that they are only a burden to society and to their family.
- Loneliness. People are social beings and work places are great to passively interact with other people and fill this basic human need. After retirement a person now has to proactively look for people to interact with which isn’t always easyh.
- Financial worries. When you work and money comes in you have a sense of financial security. You think that if I need a little extra money you can always find another job. An elderly person doesn’t have this option. They are confined to the bonds of their pension (which often times isn’t sufficient), savings, or mercy of their children. An unexpected expense can cause great tension and worry.
- Lack of motivation. Besides providing income, another important function that jobs serve is keeping someone busy. Think of your kids after 3 weeks of summer vacation if they don’t go to camp or have a job. They are “bored stiff” and miserable! Your elderly parents might be feelingthe same way.
- Bad health. Besides all of the above, older people often suffer from bad health. Even if they are generally healthy, even just aches and pains can drag a person down. This can also make them irritable.
(jobs give you a feeling that you help society)
Keep all of this in mind when caring for elderly parents and judge them favorably so that this chore of giving senior and elderly care will be easier on you and you’ll be able to look at it like a privilege!
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